You know not what you ask.

I've gotten that response so many times, these past couple of months.

And it's truth. Completely.

Things come to mind to ask for, and I pray for them, only as by His will. A bunch of times, to an awareness that there's no understanding whatsoever of what's being prayed for. To which there's always the humble realization that He'll guide me into all understanding as necessary along the way.

No matter how hard-headed I am, sometimes. Bent and broken, unto obedience. No other way.

Things prayed for over course of more than a year are coming to fruition. And the more they do, the more the prayer needs renewed.

Part of the frustration has been that I keep asking not to know what's going on. To spite myself, in ways--there's a deeper understanding of my human nature which meddles without reverence as to inspire a desire to be kept on a need to know basis, as to be unable to meddle.

The relationship is everything.

Trust is everything.

Whole-hearted, whole-minded, whole-spirited, whole-being love is everything.

...to seek that, more fully, evermore. As to embody and share such a thing.

Yet, still, these past couple days I've been so off-key. And it's frustrating. I awoke this morning to thoughts which weren't worthy. Thankfully, realized and corrected. That's a blessing.

And there've been so many things which have confused me lately, concerning churches. Still unresolved, but trust and faith aren't hindered.

Now, to go do some of the things. Church things.
Lord, help me.
I can't do this.

You have to, or it won't be done.
Please.