As Darkness Closes In: Fix Your Eyes Upon the Light of the World

Temptation increasingly abounds to be enrapt with the world's schemes and narratives--selfishness all the more exalted under a guise of righteousness. Death is increasingly a fixation, blatant--anything to avert, just anything to preserve self and those things which self wants. This, as though we have control of life and death. I can tell you from personal experience that even suicide attempts aren't successful unless the Lord allows. Which is not something to be taken lightly. Period. 

I wouldn't generally speak so flagrantly about such wretchedness, but in the noxious cacophony which is standard fare for discourse these days, such searing has occurred that little bears weight. 

Speaking plainly, though prayerfully, is what's seemed best. 

He gives wisdom for each instance, however. 

But if you're here, online, I fear that you may be consumed with much of the current mania, also. 

Current Deviations

1 John 4: 1

Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, 

for many false prophets have gone out.

Still attempting to comprehend what's going on in churches, today.

One thing which has caught attention for the past few months has been "Kundalini," which apparently is (as best my very limited understanding presently extends, and perhaps yet mistaken) a form of mystical, Hindi yoga which does often entail spiritual manifestations. Such manifestations as convulsing, twitching, writhing on the floor, falling to the ground in a state of semi-conscious euphoria (unable to get back up, for varied spans of time), uncontrollable laughter or weeping, acting as and making noises of animals, shaking uncontrollably, and...well, seemingly everything that characterizes modern charismatic "revivals."

And it's "transmitted"/ brought about by either a) being in the presence of someone who has had that "awakening experience" within themselves and who practices the form of it regularly or b) the laying on of hands, by a person who has had such an "awakening experience."

Attempted Stability...And Then, There Was Christ.

This may not last long, but there's a moment presently afforded to peace.

Everything is so strange, right now. Completely in suspension.

Striving unto holiness, striving unto Christ is the most blessed and demanding pursuit. Many difficulties. Many. Yet, the things which have been the most difficult have driven me further to rely upon Him. There's no alternative, in those moments of abject pain and uncertainty. Nothing within me, of my own will or ability, is capable of weathering such storms.

Prior to coming to know Christ, efforts would hold up for a while, but under continued stress (which was constant) and recurrent trauma (which was regular)...constant unraveling would occur. Continual breakdown. Perpetual uncertainty.

Such a distorted path to travel--always conceiving everything and anything possible, given enough motivation and effort, while continually falling apart under the strain of unrelenting chaos and destruction.