Preliminary Perusal of Practicality

Learning to witness. What it means. No longer being completely held sway of by fear...for having a clearer picture of Christ, alone.

There's a pervasive and persistent dichotomy which absolutely vexes me, though. And as it's something that exists within me, then it stands to reason (as according to Scripture, even) that others struggle with the same.

Comes and goes, though. As though walking in two worlds, when in actuality they're one.

He doesn't exist separate from us. We exist in Him. Period. All things subsist in Him, ever having been created by Christ...by the living Word of God. God Himself.

No separation.

So, why then do those moments still come on as though somehow He is of another realm?...as though, somehow, dealing with taxes...or buying groceries...or being in public...or going online...

...is somehow distinctly separate from...not His purview, per se...but from even so much an acknowledgment as there is of His sovereignty in moments of worship, devotion, study. Prayer.

Church. Such awareness of and desirous of subjection to His Presence, conscious.

There is not a separate sphere, is all. He is to be revered, regardless of circumstance--He's no less a part of ordering at McDonald's than He is of entering into the benediction. Yet, somehow, each and every bit of interaction isn't maintained per such a view to His Presence and sovereignty and omnipresence and omnipotence and will.

Never a Stranger

Today has been such a blessing. Every day is, rightly viewed....regardless whether rightly viewed, really--still, the fact is as it stands.

I was able to meet and enjoy the company of two folks passing through the area, earlier. Reminded so much of myself, so much of others whom I've known and cherished over the years. And they told me bits and pieces of their story. And I told them the most recent portion of mine (plus relevant preceding details necessary for decent context), in terms of how completely Christ has changed my life...and of the magnitude of the revelation of His ever-present reality and being.

Changed. Totally altered.

After the conversation, I prayed as to whether it would be okay and right to return to Facebook. I've been increasingly drawn there again for the past...couple weeks, perhaps? Out of nowhere. Just drawn to it. But wanted to make sure that path is according to His will, not mine, nor that of anything which might be seeking to play interference.

Meeting them today, though, and requested of Facebook...after prayer, it seemed right and good to go and ensure I was made available for finding according to email. Part of which process this time entailed going through overdue correspondence which has lain in wait for six months...or, most of it, at least. And writing. And conversing at least passingly with a couple of folks cherished.
One of whom there was time given to extended conversation, blessedly.

Myself as awkward as ever. But I'm trusting the Lord to work out the details.

For now, though. Sleep. And prayers. And gratitude.

A Longing to Approach

We need to come awake. To reality.

People yet deny His existence. Rationalizing it a million ways and back, as though mere rationalization after the fact of having decided a wrong course then somehow makes it valid.

Not so.

A thing is and then might find explanation (according to His order is it so).

But not the other way around. Our words don't create reality.

And no matter how far we might go with any projected attempt at becoming so, yet still, we are not our own creators. Thus, nor the ones who control our destiny.

You created yourself no more than I did. Thus, neither are we ever capable of doing so, no matter how deep the attempt might reach as to rationalize it so or attempt a facade enacted per such course attempted, after the fact ever of being born.

Just to Think.

Not much, right now. Praying there may be a moment again, later this week. Just a thought. Something which came, earlier...last night, really.

Not a wholly, inerrantly apt metaphor, but...

Kintsugi.

But For Love

To say that the process is awkward would be an understatement. Yet...only to the flesh--to that which craves self-centered indulgences at the expense of any else. To that sneaking, slithering bit which so loathes the thought of being restrained from any varied hint of nonsense which might otherwise, anywise, eventual seek a giving in...rationalized, per course.

But no.

That is self, exalted against Christ. That is the world, yet to be sloughed off, along course of increasing in conformity, moving nearer His glorious being, transformed from image to image, as He comes revealed.

No Good, Apart from Christ

Learning to trust. Such a strange concept, that it should be difficult to trust the Master of all that exists. How wretched must I be, to be able to in any way remain anxious over what goes or what may come...knowing the One who ordains, decrees, and allows everything which ever passes, to the utmost degree. And knowing that, as one whom He has forgiven, all things will work to good.

Whether to mine or no isn't a concern. To higher good is the concern. As to His glory.

That's all. Just to His glory, whatever comes.

What Needs Be, Regardless What Has Been

Knowing what to say and when to say it seems such a heavy matter. Discernment is an abject necessity, always.

Often remembering that the Lord told His disciples not to even consider what they would say, when taken before kings and courts--the Holy Spirit would give them what speech was necessary, in the very moment of passage.

This, even as James made case that the tongue is untameable. Wicked, unruly. So much so that those who controlled it could be counted perfect (Christ, alone, then).

In tandem, though?

Perhaps just abiding in His Spirit, in the strength of His love. To a deeper degree than generally is conceived possible or requisite any circumstance.

The Bible is our source for instruction on these matters. Our translator, the Holy Spirit.

These matters are particularly pressing, at present, as coming upon a time of necessary divulgence. As means of cleansing, unto sanctification per leadership of the Holy Spirit into a circumstance of counsel, per fellowship.

Blessed Respite: Briefly Noted

Everything has changed, again. By grace.

Still so much need for humility, for a greater awareness of and responsiveness to the needs of others, above self. Yet, the experience of being loved is increasingly humbling.

For being unconditional. For being so unworthy of such unconditional love. Yet being unconditionally loved, nonetheless.

Enough so as that everything would be changed.

There's an awareness, simultaneously arisen, that even as this moment here and now is one of solace, refuge, fellowship, growth...sanctuary in His love..

..then, still, circumstances aren't the peace. Circumstances aren't the joy. Nor the comfort. Nor what succours.

He does. Christ, my Lord. Our Lord.

Not circumstances.

Not even so blessedly comforting and serene as He has made way, for the moment. I could weep, for the sheer blessedness and gratitude wrought of such release, such a relief--even momentary.

He knows our needs, so much more deeply, precisely, and lovingly than we could ever contrive to imagine or conceive. And He tends them, so gently, thoroughly, compassionately, and with such loving grace, such mercy.

We are all so unworthy. We've all done so many things, so many, many things...which absolutely defy Him, mocking even His goodness and love--so pure and holy is He, in all His ways, as any such act seemingly even so slight is all the more horrendous for so sharp as infinite contrast. Such travesty.

Absolute travesty.

And, yet He loves.

And provides.

Unceasingly.
Unwaveringly.
Eternally.
Faithfully.

As He is, has been, and always will be.

So, this moment, now...with all the world held strangely at bay by the indomitable force of His will, as a moment of rest, in grace and buffeted by His love on all sides...

...is so deep a comfort, so severe a mercy...

I could weep, for the absolute depth of such an experience of love unimaginable, compassion and concern inconceivable, for one so wretched as me. That, yet, He loves.

Each of us. And the pastor said that these matters are not even the barest tip of the iceberg, in terms of the riches of His grace.

How it makes me long to trust Him absolutely! Trust Him unwaveringly, unceasingly to love Him to all depths and heights of possibility!

For He is worthy. He is worthy!

He is so good, so kind. So gentle. So loving.

That He would even condescend to melt a heart of stone, that it might love and experience love and joy.

Everything has changed, again. Everything is changing.

And it's all Him.