In The Valley

The Lord is so awesome. He does things that are just...incomprehensible. And so unexpected. Just having Him make Himself known, or "appearing," or however you will...in the midst of circumstances that otherwise are trying and odd and overwhelming...is such a beautiful, wonderful...well, nothing is apt, but perhaps...maybe glorious evidence of His ever-present concern, His encompassing love, and His sovereignty.

And for the first, today, to have someone say they "want what [I] have," emphatically, insistently, twice in public forum and without regard for the others listening...
...not exalting, though to be exulted in of grace extended for such an instance to ever pass the lips of anyone in regard to what's evidenced(?) of mine. And all in context of talking through the grace of God. I have Christ. That's all. The only thing. Everything.
Though He is not a "thing." He's just too far beyond comprehension for "someone" to feel sufficient. He is beyond all.

There still keeps coming the thought that "things may get so much worse before they get better," of particular matters. And of the all of life, at present. And it does tempt me to want to brace myself, quite frankly (rather than to remain grounded in trusting God moment by moment). Tempts me sorely, as so many things attempt. But I'm not giving in. Though I may let the voice even have speech, at times, it's utterly irrelevant. Because it doesn't matter what happens, God is sovereign. And He's sovereignly in charge of whatever comes every bit as much as He's been sovereignly in charge of everything which has come. Such that life hasn't left me, yet, and I can praise Him in the land of the living, still. Despite the numerous attempts to the contrary and the recklessness which peppered life, prior to surrender.

He sovereignly ordained that life wouldn't be allowed to leave, to this point. And He knows the number of my days, even now. And each tear and every sigh and every laugh and every song. So whatever comes, it will have to pass through Him in order to draw near. And no matter how grievous or trying or difficult or impossible...He will be there, still. So it'll ultimately be something He will bring me to rejoice during. Even as now, in the midst of continued uncertainty, grief, and turmoil. I could loathe that the battle hasn't ended and griefs remain unabated, but instead, I'm going to glory in Christ's sufficiency and love. In the midst of it. Because He's been gracious enough to bring to a point of doing so.

Which I'm not foolish enough to consider of my own strength or ability to manage or maintain. No--I'm so easily distracted and overwhelmed, except that I rest in Him, remaining steadfastly grounded in the simplicity of Christ. Which He must maintain despite my penchant for allowing curiosity to draw my gaze to matters which ever seem to offer a means of drawing nearer through knowledge, though more regularly tending to keep my attention overlong unto distraction from Him. And even of fellowship, apparently. But He is faithful to draw and to restrain, so I've witnessed that He's also both willing and able to afford what's necessary and restrict what becomes distraction. He realigns my focus. He is my Shepherd.