Prevailing Grace

Just trusting the Lord. The temptation to fear backlash over recent "progress" has been increasingly prevalent over course of the day. Weird stuff is apparently already happening at work, right now, in fact. Of people's perspective, as it were. 

I used to fight it, outright, when things shifted and people changed. Tried to reason, to assert truth for the sake of it being true. Again and again, the equivalent of throwing punches against the air. Our weapons are not carnal nor of the flesh but are spiritual and are powerful for the tearing down of strongholds. Mighty through God. Not of flesh and blood. Not by might nor by power. By His Spirit or not at all. 

Because it's really not flesh and blood we war against, and that's what's primarily confronted and what is so vexing. 

All last week was warfare. Random, passing fevers. Chills, headaches. And submitting to God, refusing to be cowed, each would go away without lingering effects and without hampering efforts. Only by His strength. And the mental attacks, too. Oh, all manner. But every thought, by the grace of God, brought toward remembrance of Christ's omnipotence and good will. Toward His sovereignty and redemption. And my complete powerlessness in context of recognition of His munificent majesty. 

Then to other attacks, when the initial proved faulty. Just all day, a merry-go-round of attempted temptations to get me to succumb to fears and doubts and plagues of worry. Demons from time past, even--fears which hadn't been experienced in well over a year suddenly show up again, attempting to hold court and overwhelm my trust in the Lord. 

So many things, all day. And last week. And I don't care. Whatever. 
And there's been attempt to get me to question perspective on truth, too--that was one of the most nefarious bits of temptation, as it used to constitute a substantial portion of my unwillingness to submit to Christ. Insecurity regarding my own insufficiency to even know truth, attacking as though I am therefore incapable of knowing truth. Completely ignoring Christ's sufficiency to reveal Himself, and His active proclamation as reminder through Scripture. And His leading, actively, daily. As unto trust in Him. 

Seeking to live with a clear conscience before Him, even if failing Him continually. But confessing and returning to Him for help and for forgiveness. And being willing to make whatsoever amends He would direct, but as He would direct rather than bumbling to further error of my own efforts attempted apart from His guidance. 

But I defer to Him. So what truth I know is known per His guidance and revelation. Always or continually being sought for further clarification and for correction. By whatsoever means He deems appropriate and well. Trusting even the most excruciating of losses and pains are wholly by His ordained allowance or allotment. Not unto devastation except as it draws to Himself. Unto the greater healing and prosperity, which is knowing Him, loving Him. 

So, yeah. I defer to Him. I don't have to depend upon my own insights and contemplations. That's enough. Just...noting that there is weirdness on some fronts has allowed for that temptation to fear attack. But...I keep remembering, too, the gates of hell can't stand against those who are His.

And as I'd heard it somewhat expounded, gates thus described aren't intended to keep people in but to keep people out. Taking the kingdom by violence, then. Of a sort. As Christ directs. Even if not needing leave the house to do so. Or even not needing to be concerned except with what's immediately in front of me, moment to moment. 

I don't know how He's going to maneuver things. No idea. I'm on a need to know basis, and that's above my pay grade. 

Last I'd been openly threatened regarding spiritual assault manifest in the physical, at length, the whole threat was something along lines of that no matter what God does, they see and will attack. Ceaselessly. To destroy. And to counter every move. 

Thing is, though, as the Lord has pointed out...He knows our thoughts before we do, and has for eternity past. Same of all His creatures. And in the act of an attack, all He need do is shift His own Beloveds ever so slightly to the left or right--even unawares the motion, ourselves--just that the attack misses at even the barest fraction of a second, but misses entirely. Even if only perhaps to feel the breeze of a bullet whizzing past, then still that He would shift us as according to His will. He will protect and preserve, unto His will. 

And when He allows pain, suffering, torment, death...even as like with our departed brother, Jim Elliot...then it's with a larger good in store. Though the pain may be impossible to bear, then it's to turn to total reliance upon Christ for every breath--even as He's been the One to give each one, from the beginning. 

All these attacks, though, always attempt to turn thought to self and to circumstances and even to others beloved, yet all in such a way as to make self or other obscure realization of God's active and intentional intervention in every moment of my life and the lives of us each. No heart beats except by His will. 

Perhaps tomorrow will be sedate. Perhaps the week will be, externally, and the battle will primarily rage within. Or perhaps it'll be another of those weeks where there are external and internal battles, ongoing. Regardless, the Lord's strength is my sufficiency. And His grace prevails.