Psalm 37 & Safety in Surrender

Do not worry because of evildoers,
Nor be envious toward wrongdoers;
2 
For they will wither quickly like the grass,
And fade like the green herb.
3 
Trust [rely on and have confidence] in the Lord and do good;
Dwell in the land and feed [securely] on His faithfulness.
4 
Delight yourself in the Lord,
And He will give you the desires and petitions of your heart.
5 
Commit your way to the Lord;
Trust in Him also and He will do it.
6 
He will make your righteousness [your pursuit of right standing with God] like the light,
And your judgment like [the shining of] the noonday [sun].

7 
Be still before the Lord; wait patiently for Him and entrust yourself to Him;
Do not fret (whine, agonize) because of him who prospers in his way,
Because of the man who carries out wicked schemes.
8 
Cease from anger and abandon wrath;
Do not fret; it leads only to evil.
9 
For those who do evil will be cut off,
But those who wait for the Lord, they will inherit the land.
10 
For yet a little while and the wicked one will be gone [forever];
Though you look carefully where he used to be, he will not be [found].
11 
But the humble will [at last] inherit the land
And will delight themselves in abundant prosperity and peace.

12 
The wicked plots against the righteous
And gnashes at him with his teeth.
13 
The Lord laughs at him [the wicked one—the one who oppresses the righteous],
For He sees that his day [of defeat] is coming.
14 
The wicked have drawn the sword and bent their bow
To cast down the afflicted and the needy,
To slaughter those who are upright in conduct [those with personal integrity and godly character].
15 
The sword [of the ungodly] will enter their own heart,
And their bow will be broken.

16 
Better is the little of the righteous [who seek the will of God]
Than the abundance (riches) of many wicked (godless).
17 
For the arms of the wicked will be broken,
But the Lord upholds and sustains the righteous [who seek Him].
18 
The Lord knows the days of the blameless,
And their inheritance will continue forever.
19 
They will not be ashamed in the time of evil,
And in the days of famine they will have plenty and be satisfied.
20 
But the wicked (ungodly) will perish,
And the enemies of the Lord will be like the [c]glory of the pastures and like the fat of lambs [that is consumed in smoke],
They vanish—like smoke they vanish away.
21 
The wicked borrows and does not pay back,
But the righteous is gracious and kind and gives.
22 
For those blessed by God will [at last] inherit the land,
But those cursed by Him will be cut off.

23 
The steps of a [good and righteous] man are directed and established by the Lord,
And He delights in his way [and blesses his path].
24 
When he falls, he will not be hurled down,
Because the Lord is the One who holds his hand and sustains him.
25 
I have been young and now I am old,
Yet I have not seen the righteous (those in right standing with God) abandoned
Or his descendants pleading for bread.
26 
All day long he is gracious and lends,
And his descendants are a blessing.

27 
Depart from evil and do good;
And you will dwell [securely in the land] forever.
28 
For the Lord delights in justice
And does not abandon His saints (faithful ones);
They are preserved forever,
But the descendants of the wicked will [in time] be cut off.
29 
The righteous will inherit the land
And live in it forever.
30 
The mouth of the righteous proclaims wisdom,
And his tongue speaks justice and truth.
31 
The law of his God is in his heart;
Not one of his steps will slip.
32 
The wicked lies in wait for the righteous
And seeks to kill him.
33 
The Lord will not leave him in his hand
Or let him be condemned when he is judged.
34 
Wait for and expect the Lord and keep His way,
And He will exalt you to inherit the land;
[In the end] when the wicked are cut off, you will see it.

35 
I have seen a wicked, violent man [with great power]
Spreading and flaunting himself like a cedar in its native soil,
36 
Yet he passed away, and lo, he was no more;
I sought him, but he could not be found.
37 
Mark the blameless man [who is spiritually complete], and behold the upright [who walks in moral integrity];
There is a [good] future for the man of peace [because a life of honor blesses one’s descendants].
38 
As for transgressors, they will be completely destroyed;
The future of the wicked will be cut off.
39 
But the salvation of the righteous is from the Lord;
He is their refuge and stronghold in the time of trouble.
40 
The Lord helps them and rescues them;
He rescues them from the wicked and saves them,
Because they take refuge in Him.

...

Blessed to spend time discussing recent events, then praying, with a sister in the Lord. One thing she remarked the Lord's recently been working in her heart has also been something He's worked on me regarding. There's the tendency to "give Him options" when requesting prayer.

But that's not the way of things. He knows what He's doing. We don't. He doesn't need us to tell Him how to do what needs doing, nor to give Him insight on what might be best suited to effect a particular desired end. As unto salvation, even.

He knows what's necessary. And she pointed out that He never goes with one of her options. Same, here. Though there've been a couple times when it's almost seemed like He had, and then other times when a longer-range view of things included particular desired ends. But not apparent from the outset, whatsoever.

Things with family have been of this, though there's still such brokenness and distance that to say it's in process is beyond me. Except that I know the Lord. And I know He's capable of all things. And no matter what a circumstance looks like, I know that He's faithful and just to answer those things as requested according to His will. Though it looks like things are utterly and horribly at an end, on all fronts--same as it has, but increasingly so for a while--I walk by faith, not by sight.

So effectively losing them, of a sort, per pursuing Christ and being called out of darkness, out of compromise with sin...has meant grief. But I trust Him. I don't have to know how He's going to work things out. But I know that the judge of all the earth will do what's right.

And in midst of that, His help and rescue from the wicked hasn't looked like what I'd want nor like what I had hoped. But rescue and help, nonetheless, and unto a greater trust in Him. Rather than continuing in ways I'd thought would be "better," but which wouldn't have required my dependence upon Christ and deepening love of Him, per relative isolation with Him.

Forsaking all else, then I realized myself in other darkness, still. Which again was delivered unto isolation--leaving behind everyone I cared for, effectively, again. But unto cleaving to the Lord as stepping out in faith, having prayed over all the matters to a point of receiving confirmation again and again.

I refused to move from family at first. I was so uncertain of what His will was, I insisted if He would have me move then for the sake of ensuring obedience I longed not to desire to move nor seek to move nor plan to move nor hope to move. Forsaking these things, in favor of submitting to Him and waiting upon Him. And He had to work surrender in my heart, unto acceptance of the circumstances. But once He did, then He moved me. Just per walking in truth and surrender--trusting and surrendering the entire situation to Him.

I resigned myself to whatever He would allot, trusting He would keep me in the midst of it all. And once I did so, once it was wholehearted, He delivered me. Trusting Him all the while, though.

Same it was for the odd place landed, next. Public proclamation that I would have Christ, no matter the cost, even if to lose absolutely everyone dear to me. Even if it meant walking away from everyone, again, for sake of honoring Him. And trusting Him, still, to direct.

And He did. And as oddness became more apparent, as His preservation of me through the midst of the strangeness being taught became less present...I cast myself on His mercy, and did leave. Though He led me to speak to a handful of people, at the going, as to discuss reason for leaving.

Deliverance is through surrender. His rescue seems to come as He's sought as the sole refuge, forsaking all else. Doing whatever He sets before us, along that while. But casting all cares and hopes and fears upon Him--embracing whatever His will may be--all the while. No help comes, apart from Him.

And help certainly hasn't looked like I've wanted it to, in terms of family. I thought rescue would come through being justified by Him, in the midst, as unto repentance and solidarity in His Spirit. Which...looking back on it, that is so self-exalting. I'm glad He didn't yield that. It would have puffed me up all sorts.

But that result is what I expected. I expected rescue to come per way of letting truth be known to be truth and no longer denied. Rather than they would continue to consider me demon-possessed, "turned against them" as no longer utterly complacent. I expected He would rescue by changing the situation per changing others, rather than taking me out of the situation and changing me.

He knows what's best, though. And, ultimately and truly, knowing Him and loving Him and submitting to Him, as we were created to do, is what's best: As unto reconciliation with right order. Unto true healing. Unto true peace, even in the midst of whatever other storms come. Even when He has to carry us over the waves, as we've not retained strength enough to hold His hand and walk beside.

Another thing discussed was distinction between religious affectations and actual service of God. As from last night's reading, even. We can pretend all sorts of things, in terms of following the letter of the law, in terms of adapting our lives to reflect what we read in Scripture. But it's the heart that is God's concern, foremost. The right actions come out of a wrong heart are still wrong. A bad tree can't produce good fruit. Just can't. No matter what it looks like.

And there's an underlying ideology inherent that approach to the Lord which is unconsciously remarking, "I'll submit to You, but I'm doing it my way--according to how I understand You intend me to do things." That's an attempt to maintain sovereign right to one's own life, heart, and understanding. It is an attempt to be co-regent of one's life, alongside Christ: Refusing to concede to His sovereignty, moreover.

We all have that in us, which is sin. We all do it. He has to deliver us out of these things, out of the sinful, fleshly tendencies to believe we know what's right, to believe we are capable of discerning right in our own strength by our own means, by testing according to our own minds and hearts. But that's dark waters--believing we can know right and wrong according to our intellect: No one knows their own heart, it's written. So, only the Lord knows our hearts and our thoughts, truly. And if we don't know the depths of the darkness within our hearts and minds, how could we expect light will arise from them apart from His active work?--how could we expect to discern right and wrong merely according to our own understanding and intentions?

That was the original temptation--to know good and evil, as to become independent of God in discerning matters. To be as Him.

Instead, we're called to wait upon Him, to seek to know who He is, to seek to understand His ways, and just to trust Him to guide in what's right and instruct in His truths/precepts/laws all the while. Through surrender, we are guided. In rest is our salvation. Producing fruit through our union with Him, His laws written on our hearts.

And then He exalts us to a position of absurd heights, but at the point of our abject surrender: As we seek His will, alone, He makes us coheirs with Christ. Which isn't ever unto seeking our own will, but loving His law and will, entirely submitted and surrendered to Him. Someday. He will complete the work He begins in us.

Unto humility, then. Abject humility.
He alone can work this out in us. Any attempt otherwise is inherently self-exalting.
But even to truly desire humility is a gift from Him: We wouldn't truly think to desire humility, let alone sincerely desire it, unless He caught our heart and thoughts on the matter.

I'm just praying for a friend who has recently expressed desire for humility.
The Lord is gentle. He is kind.